DnD Hilarious Experiences

[Diablo™]

I made this thread so that you can post your hilarious DnD experiences. Here is one of my own:

DM: You walk out into the middle of the field and you spot a gazebo
Player: Is it awake?
DM: It's a gazebo.
Player: But is it awake?
DM: (slightly irritated) It's a gazebo!
Player: I fire an arrow at it...what happens.
DM: Nothing it's a GAZEBO!
Player: I fire another arrow at it...does anything happen?
DM: GOD DAMMIT MAN IT'S A F***ING GAZEBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Player: Okay, I walk away.
DM: Too late, it wakes up and eats you.

(The group later explained to the player what a gazebo was)

[erizoe]

first of all..whats a gazeebo.

i was dming a group and they were trying to escape a jail and they finally did this is what follows. (it took them a good 2 hours :))

me:you break out of your cell and step into the hallway. your cellmate follows
andy:what about bubba
me:he isnt coming bnecasue you didnt realase him yet
andy: well i am just going to leave bubba and everyone except the girl whatever her name is..shese coming with me.
me: ok yu exit the door and look around.
andy: i go right
me: ok you see 20+ guards sitting at a picnic table eating sandwiches. they notice you and attack
andy: i draw my sword
me: your dead
andy: what! i want to fight
me: ok you swing at them and miss, guard 1 attacks you (rolls dice) and misses (it took me untill guard 3 to hit him to kill him)
andy: ok new charector time


sorry about long and bumbing thread but it had to be don becasue this is such a good thread

[Beholder99]

hmm my one is my friend was bard i was a rouge and my other frined was dming

F1dm: you come to a town w/ your band of bards (were together)
F2: i get out and begin to play
Me: i get out and go to my brothers grave
F1: you meet a man and have a conversation
(we then go to a bar realizing that our band was just arrested)
(we goin and later 2 gaurds walk up cause my dumb friend sat down to play his guitar)
G1: we noticed you playing you guitar and wondered if you were a bard in the band
F2: (tries to fool the gaurds not working)
Me: walks up behind the 1st gaurd and assassinates him mercilessly

guess its not that funny you had to be there one of those things but trust me at the time it was hilarious i love dnd

[Nubli]

www.bash.org

[[Ghost]]

nice spam...i thought that mods were expected to know the rules

[erizoe]

saying that was also spam. how do you know it was spam anyways it could be a d&d funny thing site probably not. another one is i was doing a scenario in a town setting here it goes

me: ok you get a letter it reads "meet me at the town hall back door at 1:00.
mike:i go and find a crack whore and we have sex......its vinnys sister
vinny:blushes
me: ok roll a d20, if you get above a 10 you don't get aids

he ended up with aids and died in a year..what a shame :) vinny wasnt to happy about that and she doesnt like mike anymore (out of game)

[Beholder99]

yea it was spam can we underlins report mod spamming? or can we just private message spitfire i like you nubli but it another mod gets kicked for spamming you should too its only fair....

yea i wish i could play dnd more often in fact i help create a dnd club in my school :)
so i get to play every tuesday and hopefully have some fun times although ill be dming...which im ok at but not the best

[[Ghost]]

i visted the site and looked around a bit no D&D stories that i saw, and if there was he shouldve stated that it was a site with D&D stories

[Beholder99]

no it was spam alright i checked it out as well... man i havent had alot of funny experiences but i had a few good one.. like i was running up stairs cause a npc used me... he was supposed to ressurect my chars gf if i killed a man for him but shit happned and i ended up fighting him...but i ran up and got to the top floor cause he was on an elevating plat for gaining power from his chohorts some arcane wizard i think it was a red anyway got to the top and the only way i could stop the ritual was killing one of his men and so i took out my bow and shot 6 arrows killing two ppl (many shot feat) ending the ritual and winning but he got away... but got my chars gf back in the process

[Beholder99]

o well

[N0vak]

i had some ok experiences in DnD its kinda fun with 3rd ed.
ok heres a highlight

i found a master lock pikkin squirrel that dicapitated an ogre in 1 hit
hahaha

[erizoe]

nice.

one quest i put new people on is the jail quest

they start out in there jail cells and after 7 rounds of them fighting or w/e te guards bring in a guy with tatoos named bubba. i put him in the cell with the most annoying person in the game :-D

[Nubli]

I post wasn't spam. www.bash.org is a great place. There are over 400,000 quotes submitted, so obviously you aren't going to find DnD stuff right away.