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+--- Thread: Poem: Speak now or forever hold your peace.. (/thread-34718.html)
Poem: Speak now or forever hold your peace.. - Nubli - 09-22-2006
I'm dazed and confused,
Lost without a map;
I see a way out,
Sadly just a trap.
I know what must be done,
But can I do it?
The walls grow higher,
Down in this pit.
On the one hand,
I perpetuate the pain;
A false sense of hope,
Nothing, not a gain.
On the other hand,
I can leave it all;
But it's hard to walk
Through a solid brick wall.
One will pain the soul,
For it shall never flee;
As long as I exist,
It won't ever leave me.
The other will hurt
Friends and mine heart;
A traitor I'll be,
Doing my selfish part.
Why can't I be happy?
Why must I do this..
To fake out others,
Is ignorance bliss?
Some have been there,
Others are concurrently;
A way to open up,
And set myself free.
The advice not ill taken,
But rather set aside;
The sails of hope fill,
A ship of terrible pride.
My purpose seems clouded,
Left for one to choose;
Am I really important,
Or just here for use?
Nothing I do or say,
Has ever lived up a way;
I say many things,
Then derail like a bad play.
I'm here for one,
Here for many;
I feel disregarded,
Like that pretty penny.
What's my purpose in this?
Why am I really needed?
Not one good thing,
Has even imaginably proceeded.
As life twists it's webs,
An arachnid of anguish;
I'm filled with regret,
Only just one more wish.
A decision of decisions,
One for all time;
Nobody should live this,
But one spirit - mine.
Poem: Speak now or forever hold your peace.. - Cr187 - 09-23-2006
Cool poem, I liked it. Some parts didn't flow that well, but it was still a great poem.
Poem: Speak now or forever hold your peace.. - Pamela - 09-23-2006
It was good.Yes some parts did not flow as well as others. This,however is not the point. The saddness and regret expressed were a powerful feeling that rocked me. Damn good job. The words were eloquent and descriptive.I applaud you.....this is the whole function of poetry.To convey in words what the heart is screaming.
Poem: Speak now or forever hold your peace.. - Nubli - 09-23-2006
I wish I could write like this without the personal feelings, sadly everything I do write requires some sort of feeling within. Without the emotion, words don't form =(
Poem: Speak now or forever hold your peace.. - Pamela - 09-23-2006
Honey this is normal...that you are so sad screams out.I wish you had a better summer.I hope things improve for you.
Poetry is an expression of emotion...yours are sad and tortured,it is difficult to write bright happy verses when you have an aching heart.
Poem: Speak now or forever hold your peace.. - Z3R0 - 10-17-2006
Nubli Wrote:I wish I could write like this without the personal feelings, sadly everything I do write requires some sort of feeling within. Without the emotion, words don't form =(
I think it an excellent piece. It is in sonet style in most senses other than sonents are only fourteen lines long. You put the words together quite addequetly. Do not be worried with not being able to put random words together and make a brillant spectacle; that will come with education and practice. Ussualy the best writers speak from personal feelings, this is because every person feels the same feelings, just in differant manners. That makes people relate to your work. Keep up the good work and let me know if you need any help. I am very good at literature.
I sense that it is about a delima that you recently faced, a hard decision for you to make. It seemed that whichever path you chose to tread would lead to obvious pain and regret. Look at it this way, sometimes you have to endure pain and sadness in order to achieve self meaning and gain happiness. Do focus on what might happen the next day, focus instead on what you wish to happen the next year.