The Diablo Daily

[Crimson_Brilliance010]

rccarkidI was wondering if i can be the "Distributer" of the paper. Like running the presses and stuff and i was wodering if i could help with photorgaphy or designing the pages for it like the front page

take what i said to the dude above u and apply it to u

[rccarkid]

Ok sorry Mr. Brillo

[jedimaster86]

Ah sorry, my name is Skitz 'O Phrenia.

In local news:
It has been reported that a man by the name of Pantallica has become permanently stuck onto his computer chair. Therefore, he passes the time by playing Diablo 2 nonstop, and therefore working on his ladder necro as much as he possibly can. It is not confirmed of his current level, but it is speculated that it is somewhere in the 70's. When questioned, Pantallica could only give us brief statements: "Leave me alone", "Damn lag!", and an occasional "Sandwich run!". We'll keep the public updated as his progress continues.
-Skitz 'O Phrenia
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In weather news:
The temperature across the Sanctuary is fluctuating rapidly. The following weather reports are brought to you by our five weather stations located across the wide world of the Sanctuary.

Rogue Encampment: Moderate weather. The high for today will be 83, low will be 68. Scattered rain showers are expected, so keep those umbrellas handy, and take shelter in desolate houses if needed.

Lut Gholein: Get that suntan lotion ready, it's going to be another hot hot day. Highs expected in the 102 range, and lows around 82. Dust storms may bring some nasty leapers or hellcats in your direction, so make sure to stay with a group and find a nice defensive area to defend yourselves if needed.

Kurast Docks: Make sure to watch out today, the humidity could take your breath away. The temperature could go anywhere up to around 94, and down to about 73. Heavy shower and t-storms may be coming your way, so expect a wet day.

Pandemonium Fortress: Warm temperatures surround the encampment here today; expect the temperature to go anywhere up to 100 or so. We, as every other day, suggest for the small population here to stay in town due to the random fire storms that may occur out there in the hellish plateaus.

Harrogath: Expect chilly temperatures today; keep those jackets on. An even chillier front could be sweeping down your way; temperatures could go down to -2 degrees and blizzards will be sweeping the area.
-Skitz 'O Phrenia

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Private Meeting: It would probably make more sense for us to be a newspaper rather than a news show; each of the various positions thus far all can be applied in the creation of a newspaper.

[Crimson_Brilliance010]

Private Meeting: It would probably make more sense for us to be a newspaper rather than a news show; each of the various positions thus far all can be applied in the creation of a newspaper.

Mr. Phrenia you've debute on the Diablo Daily was one of fiery passion and accuracy. Such not unlike my own. I would like to heartily welcome to the staff.

And refering to the note you put in the suggections box: I believe that would be best and besides since Mr. Lick is deciding to take a VACATION without telling anyone I'll have to speak with him later.

And by the way, would you be able to tell me how many points you recieved from your last bullitin

[Mushroom]

Can i help? i'll do anything to earn points.

[Nightbreed]

Apparently today a man by the name of Sage Necro has come out of the bowels of hell to join everyone at the diablo daily more at 10pm eastern!

[Crimson_Brilliance010]

Apparently today a man by the name of Sage Necro has come out of the bowels of hell to join everyone at the diablo daily more at 10pm eastern!

Private Meeting: Excuse me but who the cluck are you?!?

[Bloodangel26]

haha this is crazy...if this is a TV show can i be that guy that counts down from 5 to 1 to tell the reporters when they are on?

[Crimson_Brilliance010]

I'm sorry son. This is a newspaper.

[Bloodangel26]

darn...i am really good at counting down from 5 haha. what other jobs do you need then?

[Crimson_Brilliance010]

Well that has yet to be determined.

[Nightbreed]

This just in! Netter, the Legendary creator of EasyMap, a Maphacking program for diablo 2 has just given a man called nightbreed cd keys so that he may play again, this just goes to justify that netter is a good guy, contrary to all your beliefs.


Private Meeting: Im the Random Writer

[jedimaster86]

BLIZZARD STORMS OUT HUNDREDS OF ACCOUNTS

It has been reported that Blizzard, the creator of many popular games such as the Starcraft, Warcraft, and Diablo series have once again struck down evil with their mighty fists. Inside sources say that Blizzard was able to use a maphack know as Easymap (created by an infamous Diablo hacker known as Netter), which was the first to be released in the 1.11 patch, as a trap to take down its many unsuspecting users. Scientists say that Blizzard was able to easily catch people using the program with it's highly detectability, and therefore banned accounts and CD keys. Diablo 2 forums are now filled with people crying to get their accounts back; some people trying to bribe Blizzard off with doing various chores for the gaming company. Others are pointing a finger at Blizzard and shouting how they have broken federal crime by tapping into the users files to search for the detectable ones. Others are rejoiced at this massive banning spree that Blizzard has imposed. One of these fellow members is a moderator at d2sector.net, a Diablo 2 gaming site, who goes by the name Nub. This is what he had to say to us:

"To all who got banned, you were owned so hardcore, this must go down on some all-time list of ownings. Nothing I have ever known has topped this, or ever will. My respect for Blizzard increased 10-fold. Good riddance hackers, the game is now that much cleaner."
-Nub

This chain of bannings upon the users seem to be permanent as their accounts have gotten closed. This is also a blow for many players who had just recently started the new ladder season and was able to gain their spot on the ladder; such players include Skidude, who had a 81 sorc (was 80 or so on the sorc ladder), and Pantallica, who had a 81 necro (was 25 or so on the necro ladder). In conclusion, this shows that Blizzard is not a company that has a ZERO-tolerance on any 3rd part software, which goes against the EULA Agreement that all players agreed to on the download of the game.
-Skitz 'O Phrenia

[Crimson_Brilliance010]

Private Meeting: OKay Mr. Bree but what are your creditentials i haven't even seen you before today?

[Nightbreed]

I used to work at the Warcraft Daily

and im sexy and norwegian

[Bloodangel26]

oh i know, can i be the sports reporter?

my name can be Kraven Moorehead

[Nightbreed]

This just in! Local Necromancer slain by the Rogue Encampment bridge: WARNING! Graphic Image

[Bloodangel26]

in baseball today the travincal tentacles defeated the lut gholein scarabs 4 to 7. several scarabs exploded with electricity after the game killing 12 spectators. baal was seen laughing and was quoted saying "well at least they didn't die in vain."
-Kraven Moorehead reporting

[Nightbreed]

Breaking News, Baal, 200,589 years old of the world stone chamber was seen today stealing icecream from the bone fetishes living in the durance of hate, baal was arrested on an account of petty larceny and was put in the jails of the catacombs on 500,000 gold bond. If he makes bond, he is sentenced to trial by a jury of amazons, necromancers, barbarians and paladins from all across sanctuary on friday, august 12th, if convicted he will be sentenced to death by holy hammer and frenzy.
-Maleul Larsen, Crime and Punishment division

[Crimson_Brilliance010]

Inner Thoughts: what the cluck happened im overwhelmed i thought if i did this one day at a time i could handle this but its not working people just walking thru the front door and desacrateing the good paper that is the diablo daily well not really desacratetion but still oy o well time to assert my owner/ ace reporter power ha ha time to tell these people i dont play that ha what was i thinking i can handle this muahahaha this is gonna be good

Public Announcment: The Diablo Daily will be temporarily closing for some (coughs) reconstuction. We'll be up and running as soon as I take care of some (coughs) inner matters. That is all. Thank you for your time.

Private Meeting: All those who claim to work for me IN MY OFFICE NOW!!!:
(as Wizard Kelly) can somebody say layoffs?