Deep Thoughts

[Z3R0]

1. After they make styrofoam, what do they ship it in?
   
2. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
   
3. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
   
4. Why do irons have a setting for permanent press?
   
5. How can you tell when sour cream goes bad?
   
6. How much sin can I get away with and still go to heaven?
   
7. How young can you die of old age?
   
8. Can you be arrested for selling illegal-sized paper?
   
9. If God dropped acid, would he see people?
   
10. If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?
    
11. If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
    
12. If the number 2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still number 2?
    
13. If you ate pasta and anti-pasta, would you still be hungry?
    
14. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
    
15. If you steal a clean slate, does it go on your record?
    
16. If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?
    
17. If you're born again, do you have two belly buttons?
    
18. What if there were no hypothetical situations?
    
19. Where would we be without rhetorical questions?
    
20. Will your answer to this question be no?

[Fuggle]

Only 2 of those were close to a grin, most were just stupid.

[Z3R0]

They are more like rhetorical questions that are commonly asked.

[Mathalamus]

1. If you're born again, do you have two belly buttons

nobody can be born twice..well mabye if ur 3 months early like me than born to the family 3 months later

[Quadzilla2win]

these thoughts are the exact opposite of deep. sorry.

[Bloodangel26]

Will your answer to this question be no?

this one made me smile. haha

[ggkthx]

Eh that's alot to read O.o but ...

If the number 2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still number 2?
Lol

[Z3R0]

Very well, the attempt at moderate humor does no;t apeal to you, so... I will post something truly humorous.

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what "they" call it: the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that.

KEN STARR:
I intend to prove that the chicken crossed the road at the behest of the President of the United States of America in an effort to distract law enforcement officials and the American public from the criminal wrongdoing our highest elected official has been trying to cover up. As a result, the chicken is just another pawn in the president's ongoing and elaborate scheme to obstruct justice and undermine the rule of law. For that reason, my staff intends to offer the chicken unconditional immunity provided he co-operates fully with our investigation. Furthermore, the chicken will not be permitted to reach the other side of the road until our investigation and any Congressional follow-up investigations have been completed. (We also are investigating whether Sid Blumenthal has leaked information to the Rev. Jerry Falwell, alleging the chicken to be homosexual in an effort to discredit any useful testimony the bird may have to offer, or at least to ruffle his feathers.)

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

DR. SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes!
The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed,
I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA:
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE:
It is in the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX:
It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN:
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN:
What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

FREUD:
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook-and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?

LOUIS FARRAKHAN:
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

THE BIBLE:
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS:
I missed one?

[owner16]

nope, not funny at all

[Silver Ice]

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

cause chuck norris said so.

[N0vak]

y did the chicken cross the road?

because it was a 4 way ah hahahaha rotflmao

[Tap]

RONALD REAGAN:
What chicken?

...................

[chicken24]

ok.. I got one..

Why do we drive on a parkway, and park on a driveway?

[Mathalamus]

why did the chicken cross the road?

to escape extinction lol

[Bloodangel26]

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

cause chuck norris said so.

agreed. and you would too if chuck norris said so...

mathalamathamalathusimus that was incredibly un-funny. you should probably punch yourself

[pyrocrow]

wow, looking back at this thread, I haven't laughed once. These suck bad.

[Bloodangel26]

i havent laughed once either...like i said earlier, 1 of them did make me smile, but thats it. are 'deep thoughts' supposed to be funny though?

[FrogMan]

yea deap.. deap in sleep

[grimm669]

If you throw a kitten out the window does it become kitty litter?

Why do they steralize the needles for leathal injections?

When u choke a smurf, what color does he become?

If there is no god, who pops up the next kleenex in the box?

[Z3R0]

The Blonde Nun

One night a blonde nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her. God said: "My daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love for your fellow creatures and your actions and prayers are always for the benefit of others. I have come to you, not only to thank and commend you, but to grant you anything you wish" . "Dear Heavenly Father, I am perfectly happy. I am a bride of Christ. I am doing what I love. I lack for nothing material since the Church supports me. I am content in all ways," said the nun. "There must be something you would have of me," said God. "Well there is one thing" she said. "Just name it," said God. "It's those blond jokes. They are so demeaning to blondes everywhere, not just to me. I would like for blond jokes to stop." Consider it done," said God. "Blond jokes shall be stricken from the minds of humans everywhere. But surely isn't there something that I could do just for you," asked God. There is one thing. But it's really small, and not worth your time," said the nun. Name it, please," said God. "It's the M&M's," said the nun. "They're so hard to peel.