Who The Hell Is Jehova

[Blueballsofsteal]

Its 7:30 A.M. Thanksgiving day morning and i get a knock at the door, Damn im pissed cause now i have to get out of bed! Its a very large black man and a white woman and 4 young children, the first thing they say to me when i open the door is, if you died today where would your spirit go? Ohhh that was the wrong thing to say to a half asleep redneck, and i bit my tongue and said alright what can i help you with? The woman looks at me and says Jehova Calling! OK who the hell is Jehova i reply. They go on to explain that they are Jehova's whitnesses and that they are in my neighborhood to spread the glory of the word of Jehova, So i say to them are you talking about GOD? They say yeah Jehova, so i say is that his brother or something, cause i havent got a clue at this point. They ask to come into my house, they want to witness to me, but im in my boxers and a smile, so i tell them this isnt a good time, they then ask can we leave you with some pamphlets and magazines that explain what we are about and our message, so i say yeah sure anything so i can go back to sleep. so they hand me this stack of literature, then say I owe them 5 bucks, OK thats enough, veins popping out the forehead now, i throw the books out the door and say get the hell off my porch and dont come back!
Last time i had this much fun was when i was visited by two Mormon kids on bikes wearing 3 piece suits, they showed up at 9:00 oclock at night!
Before you start yes I do believe in GOD! I just dont believe in pushing it on everyone else at the wrong time!confused:

[Spitfire]

Yea... They used to be really annoying around here too (In Aus)... I dont believe in any of that stuff either so I guess its more annoying for me... But they dont come around this town anymore as people started to get restraining orders and such against them lmao.

[Bioxx]

as an ex-jehovahs witness i can tell you that those were not real JW's. it is there policy not to ask for money. not to mention there policy is also not to start going door to door until 9 am. or later. also they only go to someones door with 2, max of 3 ppl at 1 time. You had con artists at your door my friend.

[Blueballsofsteal]

Nahh ive seen this family in my community, they are Jehovahs witnesses, They are dedicated, but im just not buying it! The WatchTower and The Awake ring a bell to you? those were the magazines they were leaving.

[FraterPerdurabo]

I hate that so much. I have nothing against people haveing less "ordinary" beliefs, but when they come around spreading them, especially early in the morning just makes me want to punch them. How the hell do they think they are going to get supporters like that? Complete lack of logic + intelligence.

[Deadlyy-Guy]

Story time!

last time this happened to me at my old house i was in my boxers watchin tv drinkin a beer. this woman knocked on my door and i answered it and she started askin me if i had found jesus. so i looked at her for a second. finished my beer, handed the can to her and said "drop that in the trash on your way back to the street, thanks" and closed the door.

Here's something fun to try as well!
answer the door naked and when they ask you "have you found jesus?" shout, No i sure haven't why don't you come in and help me look! then turn and walk away from the open door motioning for them to follow. i GUARANTEE they won't be back!

[Aemaeth]

I hate the jehova people. I tell them i don't want pamphlets then when i close the door they shove them through the letterbox. then i go shove them back down their ****ing throats.

[FrogMan]

Yea, i dont care what you believe in just don't push it on others like that

[Fuggle]

Damn Jehova Witness's. Hey want us to help you discover Jesus? **** off.
Well whenever they come to my house I just say give me a sec to change shirts and go and put on my "If Jesus Comes Back We'll Kill Him Again" Shirt. That end's the conversation with them fast.

[fleaflickerx]

ahhh i saw that on tshirthell.com as well as many other "in apporprate" shirts but there was an extreme asmish christian people coming around my neightborhood so i went and got my best but shirt and all the electric applicance i had running, i got my cell phone PDA laptop dvd tv radio computer running and awnsered the door with all this shit running, they knocked, i open the door the man made a cross and turned around and left, that ended the amsih in my neightboor hood, OOOO then the army people, im not even going into what i did there. lets say it almost got me in ALOT trouble.

[Deadlyy-Guy]

u dropped the soap didn't you flea... and they were mad because you wouldn't pick it back up

[DaRK_IMMoRTAL]

Story time!

last time this happened to me at my old house i was in my boxers watchin tv drinkin a beer. this woman knocked on my door and i answered it and she started askin me if i had found jesus. so i looked at her for a second. finished my beer, handed the can to her and said "drop that in the trash on your way back to the street, thanks" and closed the door.

Here's something fun to try as well!
answer the door naked and when they ask you "have you found jesus?" shout, No i sure haven't why don't you come in and help me look! then turn and walk away from the open door motioning for them to follow. i GUARANTEE they won't be back!

not unless they get turned on roflmfao~

[SpoonMan999]

That would be prison, there's a slight diference there.

[nujabes]

yea this one time when i was younger i was playing outside in front of my house and then some mormons on bikes came up and asked if my parents were home. i was younger so i didnt know to say no so i said yes. they ended up talking to my mom for about an hour and gave her pamphlets and such.
i find them really annoying to come house to house

[fleaflickerx]

uhhh. yea im 16 i don't think im the milktary or prision and tehy were recuring foor 2 door then the cops got invold and it escolated from there.

[Fykins]

God? Jehova? Are they professional football players or somthing? Because I don't watch many sports. haha

I'm glad I live in a small town so I don't have to deal with that crap.

[DaCougarMech]

more like jehovah's salesmen

[[/sarcasm]]

Someone told me that Jehovah is God's name or some crap like that... He gave me a couple verses but I don't like the Bible.

[DaCougarMech]

we call god...god
some religions call god by the name jehovah like we call people mike
it's god's name

[NightHawk]

// Not going to say anything more.