Making her grow up.

[Pamela]

My daughter back from surgery
she fell over on me and I barely caught her
understand she out weighs me and this was a surprise
she had nobody drive her to surgery
her brother refused
so she drove herself
they wouldn't let her leave without a ride so she called her best friend
she wanted to come to me and was still under the influence of drugs
*influence
one causes you to be honest
apparently I made an impression on the nurses and doctor
she said when she was called in..they were all looking around her asking where her Mom was
So she was forced to do this solo
she was scared and woke up crying for me
her best friend said she wanted to see me right after she picked her up
so
I examined the surgery and put a band aid on the IV puncture because the gauze and tape had fallen off
She sincerely apologized and admitted she was out of line
I told her that she needs to say that to her Dad
She pissed me off
the apology is accepted
but we will see if behavior changes
he stood up for me
now I am sticking up for him
she was scared and needed me
I took care of immediate issues
She left nearly passing out...balling tears..telling me she loves me
I told her friend...get her home...get the prescriptions filled..call me if there is a problem
that was my morning love




I typed all this to my game husband after it happened.You need to understand what she did to her brother and to me.
She went into his computer and created a password when he did not have one..and was allowing her to use his to access her e-mail,

Strike 1.
She then comes by bright and early on payday and wants money/computer usage. I say no so she rips the cords from the wall and computer.

Strike 2.
Since NOW the phone did not work I walked across the street to the neighbors.Little miss priss did not know who I was calling,has an arrest record....and got in her truck and left.

I refused her calls and responded only to her doctors and nurses...

She fought with her DAD and text to him "F.CK OFF"
Strike 3.

After being ignored and alone she decided she had been out of line.
Her ripping cords out sent a power surge that flipped a breaker. The surge protector worked but it got fried and I replaced it.

It had the fax machine on it..the scanner/printer..the fridge...the phone...the computer...yah...I think her Dad being angry was reasonable.

[wazzacky]

im not sure what your asking for tho pam. I can relate thou. Not directly butt my brother-in laws cousin, who is quite close to us, has a son who at like age 21 robbed a mcdonalds because he owed some bad people money (i think). He was in jail for like 3 years and got addicted to crystal meth while there. My brother inlaws cousin has spent tens of thousands of dollars on rehab centers to get his son back. It works for a couple of monthes but than he just goes back to it. We were in victoria last week walking down a street to a restaurant and i see him with this punk guy. They were both f**cked up. High on something. He barely even remember my name, and his hand was purple (probably fought someone earlier). He has everything..Had everything they even let him stay with his dad and brother at a nice condo in downtown. We get a call last week from the other son saying that hes there with a couple of other guys stealing liqour. Thats when he drew that last straw. His dad convinced him to give the dad his keys and he was kicked out. He is dead to him now. He tried for 10 years.

[Frai7ty]

Wow, Pam, I am sorry to hear that this has happened. I hope things are getting better.

[Pamela]

Thanks love ^^ Not really after anything but really needed to vent to friends.
Anyone with similar stories please share them here.

I love my family make no mistake...but I am more intelligent and stronger than she is.
When pushed....I push back.
I do not CARE how much I love you. There is right and wrong...there is a line of respect you DO NOT cross...period.
My daughter crossed it and I did not help her through surgery.
There are consequents to actions...she needed to learn this.

[Mathalamus]

some people are diffrent.

in florida it must be ok to kick someone out becauyse the weather is almost always nice, but kicking someone out with no chance of finding a safe home in calgary will mean death.

[wazzacky]

in the winter u mean. I wouldn't let a person, who was just using me, stay in my house if i lived in anchorage.

[Mathalamus]

well i dont want to be responsible for someone dying in the cold if i can prevent it.

[hellsing293]

Pam, as much as I love you, everytime I come to this thread I try to make sense of the story but the choppiness fries my brain halfway through. Did she have surgery or did she go to the hospital because she was drunk/high? Is it HER that has the police record? How old is she and does she live with you? What do you mean by "payday"? Is she like 16 and asks for money or is she 25 and works for you? What's up with the whole computer password issue?

[Pamela]

Ok to clarify..she is almost 21 and only just got a part time job.She has not lived at home for over 3 years. The *payday* was MINE and she wanted money. So NO MATH I did NOT kicker out of the house where she was LIVING....I got her out of MY house.

She lives with her boyfriend and I help them financially as much as I can.Her surgery is because she cut her hand and the tendon severed,needing to be re-attached.

After 6 months of therapy function had not returned so another surgery was scheduled.

My point was that you do not ask people to help...throw a tantrum...try and ruin their possessions ...and expect them to just let that slide. Mom don't work like that,trust me on this.

I made sure she had food at HER place and she was taken care of...but asked her not to come back to MY place without an attitude adjustment.

Make sense now?

[Mathalamus]

no, then again my brain is fried beyond recognition

just kidding i do understand. i woudlent let it slide if someone ruined my possesions.

[hellsing293]

Yes, thank you for the clarification. Maybe if she has kids one day she will realize what she has done to you and apologize.

[Mathalamus]

i wouldent count on it.

[Pamela]

You would be wrong she already has. The police record is hers and she has been arrested twice for stupid things.

She wants me in her life,but is a spoiled brat and wants it all on her terms.

This does not work for me

[Nethran]

I'd come upside her head with the back of my hand. Lol. Just kidding. I know some people like her. They don't care about many people outside of themselves, they generally don't do anything unless it benefits them, and they tend to blow up at people if they feel they're being or have been slighted somehow. Not little blow-ups. Big ones. But hey, that's bi-polar disorder for you. I don't know if your daughter is bi-polar, but I can easily draw parallels between her actions and those of some people I know.

[Pamela]

I suspect you are correct.Her anger is often instant and over reaction to the situation.When she and her boyfriend visit and stay a while I just pray they leave soon,because they bicker and fight constantly.

I honestly feel sorry for him and hope he learns how to better verbally defend himself....

[Mathalamus]

I suspect you are correct.Her anger is often instant and over reaction to the situation.When she and her boyfriend visit and stay a while I just pray they leave soon,because they bicker and fight constantly.

I honestly feel sorry for him and hope he learns how to better verbally defend himself....

funny, im in the same situation, me and my girlfriend bicker all the time. tho lately im getting the upper hand. all it took was to not fear her.

[Nethran]

That's where people get mad at you, Math. You took a thread that had nothing to do with you and made it about you and your girlfriend. You have to stop doing that.

[Mathalamus]

but im in the same situation. is that so off topic?

[Pamela]

If you aren't my daughter then yes it is.How about starting your OWN thread if you wish to talk about your girlfriend?
~closed